Wait

Wait, for now.
Distrust everything if you have to.
But trust the hours. Haven’t they
carried you everywhere, up to now?
Personal events will become interesting again.
Hair will become interesting.
Pain will become interesting.
Buds that open out of season will become interesting.
Second-hand gloves will become lovely again;
their memories are what give them
the need for other hands. The desolation
of lovers is the same: that enormous emptiness
carved out of such tiny beings as we are
asks to be filled; the need
for the new love is faithfulness to the old.

Wait.
Don’t go too early.
You’re tired. But everyone’s tired.
But no one is tired enough.
Only wait a little and listen:
music of hair,
music of pain,
music of looms weaving our loves again.
Be there to hear it, it will be the only time,
most of all to hear your whole existence,
rehearsed by the sorrows, play itself into total exhaustion.

-Galway Kinnell

Notes

Galway Kinnell wrote this poem for a a student who was considering suicide after the sudden end of a romantic relationship. Knowing this, the poem arrives more sharply, like breathing in winter air.

The admonishment to “wait” is nothing new, though it is worth repeating. There’s a reason that the phrase, “time heals all wounds” is a cliche. In most cases, at least, it is true. Kinnell’s description of the grieving process rings true with anyone who has gone through a loss. The first sign of healing is not that you are happy, but that things “become interesting.” And following that, some things even become “lovely again.”

the need
for the new love is faithfulness to the old

The force of love is not dependent on a particular person, though it is often experienced that way. But love is love, and ultimately, we are to be faithful to love itself. And to do that requires loving.

music of looms weaving our loves again.

I simply love this image. What a beautiful line.

Be there to hear it, it will be the only time,
most of all to hear your whole existence,
rehearsed by the sorrows, play itself into total exhaustion.

This is where the poem becomes truly new, and truly amazing. What does it mean? Perhaps we don’t quite know. But we are intrigued. We are willing to hang around long enough to find out.

Resources

If you or someone you know is considering suicide, please see these resources for support.

• Call 988 for the Suicide and Crisis Lifeline
• Call 866-488-7386 for the Trevor Help Line (LGBTQ+ crisis line)
• Call 1-800-799-SAFE (7233) for the Domestic Violence Hotline
• Call 1-800-723-TALK (8255) for the NAMI Teen Helpline
• Text “home” to 741741 for the Crisis Text Line
• Call 1-800-273-8255 for the Veteran’s Help Line